Get real

How do ya know when someone has an iphone?
They tell you.

Ok it's an old joke, and not as relevant now because loads of people have them, but it's one I still manage a snide chuckle at. Especially when someone's Ipod battery dies a few hours after leaving the house. Or when someone's Ipod breaks for absolutely no reason. Or when someone tries repeatedly to get on the internet, strain and anger evident on their face, only to eventually realise their valiant efforts have been in vain due to lack of signal...
 Eh, HELLO!? If you can't go on the internet, DO something else.

Man, the internet at my finger tips is one thing I can really do without. When I'm out and about, do I really want to be checking my Facebook updates every 5 minutes?? If I have a spare minute to myself, do I really want the first thing that comes into my head to be to do with online social networking!!?? I'm on these sites enough when I'm at home, I don't want them following me like a bad habit when I'm away from a computer... I'd say for students and young people of my generation, Facebook is the ultimate bastion of procrastination.
 BORING
 And here, Do I really need an app that tells me how long it's gonna take my beer to get to a certain temperature after I put it in the fridge???

Iphones have great features no doubt. The camera on it is pretty cool, the best a mobile phone has probably. But if taking photos was my thing I'd just buy a whopper camera, for probably the same price. Obviously, they have great memory and can store lots of information. Gotta compensate for a 10 hour lifespan eh?
They also have really cool language features. Like for instance, you can speak English into the phone and then it converts it to Spanish or French or whatever and plays what you said back for someone to listen to in their native language. That's a really cool feature.. but down the line is the likes of that just gonna make people lazy? Why bother learning something new when my phone will do it for me?

I'll make no bones about my phone..it is OLD. What's the average life of a phone?? I dunno, but my phone is 5 years old. And in phone years, that's vintage son. It also resembles an incomplete sculpture by a 1st year art student and has broken apart half a hundred times. BUT... it has never stopped working.

Along the evolutionary line of phones, it came just after the brick era and it can therefore fit in my pocket easily. It phones people and can text people. For fuck sake, it even had a camera ( it also add a light, a back cover, and a few superfluous appendages that have not lasted the test of time). All casualties of war.
My phone is but a simple tool.
It's something I can live without for a few hours too.